I have a rubber mat under this really sweet, ergonomic office chair that my work place gives me in order to make up for the ridiculous number of hours they expect me to work. The problem is, whenever I roll off the mat to get something from across the office or to sit at a different table, I have what you might call a little problem getting back on. You would think 50 times or so of doing this would lead to my finally catching on, but it hasn't. Instead, every single time, I try to roll back on at top chair speeds and the following happens (picture in slow motion for greatest effect).
I do a lot of dictating at work. After using a handset for a long time and realizing that this was causing a serious dispute between my neck and I, I decided to order a phone headset. I love it. Incidentally, I can't put it on without doing my best pop star imitation. I preferred Janet Jackson until not-so recent events led to a very different image being conjured up whenever I told people that.Marsha's chair hits the edge of the rubber mat.
Chair stops abruptly;Marsha does not.
Marsha pitches forward head-first into large office desk.
Marsha exclaims not-so-lady-like expletive.
Marsha laughs at herself for doing it again and again.
Anyway, so I dictate with this headset. I have even mastered the art of dictating and eating by maneuvering food around the headset at the same time. It's a real job skill. What I apparently have not mastered is taking off the headset, because everytime it gets all tangled in my hair and I have to spend like 5 minutes getting it out. Very impressive indeed. It is closely approximated but not quite matched by the "earring stuck in the sweater while pulling sweater over the head" incident of March 2006. Somehow I got into some sort of straight-jacket position with that one, and it was not an easy feat to get out. Good times.
4 comments:
So the ideal would be...you rolling off the plastic mat...your foot falling asleep...trying to push yourself back onto the mat with your sleepy foot, but it gives out and you end up with your body lunging into the lap of a cliet. Yeah. The Marsha Show.
yeah, i think we're all pretty glad cameras don't follow us around all day... scary, scary. but thanks for giving the written commentary on your exploits. :)
I wish a camera would follow you around all day. i think you're making half this stuff up. there's no way one person could experience all this in a lifetime, let alone a couple weeks time.
that being said, i can't wait for the next installment of the wacky marsha show.
Grizz- all true, I swear. If I'm not mistaken, you were actually around my house somewhere during the "earring stuck in the sweater while pulling sweater over the head" incident of March 2006. I'm surprised you didn't hear me laughing.
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