I like to watch people in crowds and ponder their interactions with each other. I especially like to observe people when they are having a personal moment – either a positive or a negative one.
I like to study people’s faces to look for their real, possibly unspoken reactions to situations.
I like to stare at the scene of an accident in order to see what kind of tragedy has occurred, and then I ponder how it may affect the lives involved.
I like to ask people questions that get at the root of what they are thinking and feeling. I just think we too often hang out on the surface and miss out on all the wonders that can be found beneath.
And I like to read people’s blogs in order to learn about them, including stuff they don’t share in person. And this creates for me a level of intimacy with the person. For the people who are willing to share that level of intimacy, it doesn’t turn out to be a problem – just another avenue with which to draw closer to one another in friendship. And for people I don’t really know anyway, it’s not a problem because I don’t really have an emotional investment. It then becomes a way of creating a more limited relationship. But for people who are in my life but not otherwise willing to share and discuss the things they blog about in person, it’s an emotional disparity that I find myself on the losing end of. It’s a form of relationship that leaves me feeling empty and let down.
And I worry that we might be becoming a blogging generation that is losing out on real emotional intimacy. I think that blogging can create and even enhance relationships. But I also think, if allowed to, it can become a second-rate replacement for true relationship. Emotional voyeurs are especially vulnerable. *
So, hi. I’m Marsha. And I’m an emotional voyeur.
And everyone says, …”Hi Marsha...”
*The contents of this blog have been previously discussed with people in my life and thus are not themselves an example of emotional exhibitionism and voyeurism through blogging.
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8 comments:
favorite part?
the disclaimer at the end...a nice touch
hi marsha
i won't belabor the point too much, as we have talked about this. :)
but yeah... interesting thoughts. i would tend to agree. i try to think about the 'audience' as i post. for the most part, i try to steer clear of writing posts about topics i wouldn't feel comfortable discussing with the audience.
but oh well... to each his own...
the term 'emotional voyeur' makes it sound so creepy. :)
Great post!! No wonder it took so long to post ;-) it was really good though. Asked a lot of questions, have some branches and subplots to consider. Well done Marsha Nortz, this gets you an A- !! You may now give the teacher his apple!
Ok, though to answer Candyce’s comment, is it creepy? That we are peeking into each other’s lives scrumptiously? how is this for a twist? is god also reading our blogs and that is the only way he gets to see what we are about, instead of us bringing our pain to him, do we instead put it out for the world to see and ask if anybody there can save us? our blogs are all our cries for help. our modern day diaries but with 2 of our closest friends reading it. or 1 million people we have not gotten as chance to get to know, or a unwilling to know. yes, we do come out losers. I want to step away from the woods of shadowy hesitancy and into the open meadow of love, mutual acceptance and compassion for our shared human condition. I want to embrace people and say friends, we are family. let us put away sibling rivalry. let us all hold hands and say, "let's go talk to dad together"
the kool-aid is the shizzle for rizzle!!!!!!!!!!!!''
I love you guys like dear children, and I wince when I have to spank anyone.
ok, the men in white coats can take me away now. I will go peacefully. with a drooling smile and a crazed look. at least the cell will padded. free rent...
I started correcting the spelling errors and then I got bored towards the end. Stupid ADD…
OH AND I HAVE TO WORK TODAY SO NOT HAPPY I AM NOT OUTISDE RDING MY HUFFY IN THE GREAT WEATHER!
p.s. surreptitiously INSTEAD of scrumptiously. Ahhh, makes more sense now. Addled brain.
marsha,
even though i have never met you, i feel like we would be friends. i always appreciate what you have to say - thanks for sharing
I also like to watch.
(Am I getting to predictable?)
Yeah, claiming to be a "voyeur" definitely comes with a heavily negative connotation, in that generally voyeurs take pleasure in seeing the pain of others -- though from what you explain in your entry it seems you are more interested in the innocent act of observation. I'd coin a lighter, purer phrase to describe it, myself . . .
I understand...and can relate to it. I guess I can call myself an emotional voyeur in some sense.I'm into a relationship which can be called as 'love-hate'(from my side at least). My partner says he loves me but I don't feel it from him as most of the times he is indifferent and uncaring, even when he knows that he hurts me constantly.He doesn't take out time to spend with me and shows no kind of excitement or happiness in being with me. He knows I'm unhappy but does nothing, only says that this is how he is and I can leave him if I want to , but he wouldn't make any effort. I cannot let him go, I love him too much...but when I tell him about my desires either he pooh poohs it as dumb or act as if he's turned temporarily deaf. Do you know what I do? I watch the wedding video highlights of seemingly happy couples and stare at photographs of happy couples holding hands or bonding emotionally.This has been going on from ages and I have been obsessively following some 'nice couples' on Facebook, the joy that they exhibit is exhilarating- its precisely what Iam missing in my relationship. The sight of those make me feel momentarily happy. And when I come back from that illusory world I feel wretched again. I'm a literature student and I have flights of imagination. My emotional condition is killing my creativity. I sit in my room like a zombie..tears don't come out anymore just a feeling of getting sucked into nothingness. I have been wondering what to call my condition..and the phrase 'Emotional voyeur' just popped up..thanks for letting me vent it out!
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